dreamer dabble

the constant battle

2009-01-15T20:27:00.002-05:00

I went to the DR's and surgery is not the answer for right now. The ligaments are stretched and slightly stressed, and when they are stressed - they refuse to work in the way which they were intended. Therefore, I am still inmy cast - and will be heading to a foot and ankle specialist to see what he can do. I am very annoyed and enraged. My ankles have been the source of much pain and torment since the age of 13 - when my gram - ran over the right one with the car. Lovely huh!

I have been putting in a lot of hours lately, and am feeling the effects of it. The group of girls we have now - are exhausting. I mean - I come home - and collapse. Drained to the point where I am forced to tape a lot of my favorite shows in order to get my beauty rest.

I hope this finds all of you well.

UPDATE 2009

2009-01-08T16:37:00.003-05:00

Time flies faster lately than in years past, I mean seriously - we are almost half way through January, and it seems like yesterday - we celebrated my birthday. There are small bits of news to report:

1. On November 9 - I rolled my ankle after being pushed in a game with the kids from the Youth Group - the girl denies any involvment in the crime. Since that injury, I have been unable to support myself as I walk. I went to the DR - and I was placed in a walking boots for 5 weeks. I went back to the doctor as I have noticed no improvment, and I also noticed I can no longer turn the right foot to the right, and there still was a large lump below my ankle bone. I returned to the doctor, and was placed in a large yellow cast. MRI - and I find out more tomorrow about the damage that was done.

2. I am in the year leading up to my 30th birthday. I know some people dread this, but I am excited about - a major birthday - which will warrent a huge party. Seriously, I would love to have friends and family join me for the party - watch your emails.

3. For the past few months, I have been directing a group of homeschoolers in a play- A Christmas Carol. It was the first time I directed something, and I enjoyed it so much. We had to perform the play after Christmas due to the weather, but the kids did great.

So that's it for me...hope all is well with all of you...

Maine

2008-12-10T23:10:00.004-05:00

Reasons to Not Like Maine so Much!

1. Winter begins with utterly cold weather, lately it has been 3 or 4 degrees.

2. Although most people in Maine have been around for previoius winters, they drive like it was the first time they have seen snow.

3. Since the leaves have fallen, everyone waits for the first snow. The wait is what drives me nuts!

4. The weathermen are NEVER right!

5. Ice on top of Snow....not so much!

Therefore, I am not impressed with the weather lately!

busy yet needy....

2008-12-02T12:49:00.002-05:00

Dear Friends,

For those of you who follow this blog and its lack of posts - I am sorry. I do need the blog and I promise to be more productive with my writing. I do find writing theraputic, and I know people enjoy it. Therefore - I will write more, post more, and invite more of you to join on the journey of my life.

Meegan

Boston 2008

2008-07-23T15:59:00.011-04:00

We went our first family vacation since 1992 - and it was such a great time...

Day One- A Behind the Scenes of Fenway Park -Museum of Fine Arts - Sky Walk a top of the Prudential Building..
Day Two - Fourth of July - Walked the Freedom Trail - Swimming at the hotel, and Boston Pops, Rascal Flats Concert with fireworks and jet fly over.

Day Three - Museum of Science and Lunch at Cheers - swimming at the hotel...

Day Four - Aquarium, Fajitas & 'Ritas, Swan Boats in Boston Common, and Make Way For Ducklings

Day Five - Franklin Park Zoo -

It was such a great time,and we really can't wait until the next one. The kids had so many new adventures - riding the subway, being in a large city, seeing "the most beautiful place on earth. (fenway)" - and taking an elevator up 51 stories...I am so blessed to have such a great family who always makes me laugh, and always is there.

I suppose....blogging doesn't hurt...

2008-05-28T15:21:00.008-04:00

While checking through my daily blogs, I have decided that blogging doesn't take any more time than journaling or using the phone, and since I don't( can't) to the people I check on, It makes sense to blog....

Winter has past and spring/summer is upon us...I have began my garden, growing the seedlings indoors, and then transporting them out soon, has proven to be quite successful.

I went to SC this winter to see Gaven, and as usual the visit

and time was just what the Dr ordered.

I have been busy with the new camera, and filling the wallet as well with weddings and grad parties....

I have upgraded to a Sony A 200 - which proves to be one of the greatest cameras I have ever put my hands on. At a recent wedding, I took over 1200 shots, compared to my normal of 400...and no hassle with the film. :)

I am going on vacation with the family in July - and we are heading to Boston for 6 days and 5 nights....all four kids in tow - I truly can't wait...

Speaking of kids, I have a grand opportunity coming in the fall....since many of my friends and family home school their kids - some classes are not the easiest to to teach. Since I have a passion for the arts and art itself --- I will be teaching ART to 9 home schoolers...I am truly thrilled about the chance to impart knowledge onto the growing minds of today....

There you have it....update on the life of Meegan....

2007-12-24T16:55:00.000-05:00

Our first sledding trip of the year...so much fun!
Good friends are good for the soul!

movin' on

2007-11-08T17:39:00.000-05:00

I've dealt with my ghosts and I've faced all my demons

Finally content with a past I regret

I've found you find strength in your moments of weakness

For once I'm at peace with myself

I've been burdened with blame, trapped in the past for too long

I'm movin' on

I've lived in this place and I know all the faces

Each one is different but they're always the same

They mean me no harm but it's time that I face it

They'll never allow me to change

But I never dreamed home would end up where I don't belong

I'm movin' on

At last I can see life has been patiently waiting for me

And I know there's no guarantees, but I'm not alone

There comes a time in everyone's life

When all you can see are the years passing by

And I have made up my mind that those days are gone

I sold what I could and packed what I couldn't

Stopped to fill up on my way out of town

I've loved like I should but lived like I shouldn't

I had to lose everything to find out

Maybe forgiveness will find me somewhere down this road

I'm movin' on

It is amazing how things in life can come at you so fast, and before you know it - they have gone by in a flash. Change can often be your best friend, and it is mine, lately.

London - PART TWO

2007-11-06T22:28:00.000-05:00

Mariah woke up early for the drive into London. We faced, yet again, rain and traffic - but what we didn't realize was - if the signs said no service (i.e. gas, food) - they truly meant no service. Our gas tank was low, and we were 0 miles to empty according to the gauge, but we were 8 miles to the airport. I have never been so worried of breaking down in my life. Thankfully - we made it to the rental car return safe and sound - with no gas.

After arriving in London, we made our way through the rain to our airport. A larger place than before, and we were close to the Underground station. We then grabbed a bite to eat, and decided to go and see all of the theatres. One the way, we just checked to see if they had any cheap tickets to WICKED - and they did - and so we went. :) - and it was amazing.

The next day we decided to head to the Apsley House - the current home of the Duke of Wellington. It was a gorgeous home - all the different floors. After the house, we walked in Hyde Park, and headed towards Buckingham Palace, there we caught the end of the Changing of the Guards.

From there we made our way to Westminster Abbey, Jewel Tower, and outside the House of Lords and Commons - and ending our walk at Big Ben. Everything was so grand and each place was more glorious than I ever imagined. We had lunch on the River Thames - across from the London Eye, and made our way back to the hotel - after a long day of walking.

The next day, we toured more locations - Tower Bridge, Tower of London, Chiswick House and Wellington Arch. For our final night - we decided to take in another show. I went and saw The 39 Steps and Mariah went to Lord of the Rings - the musical. Both were great hits for each of us, and we made our way back to hotel, and slept soundly - as we had a long day of travel ahead.

We made our way to the airport, and boarded our plane, with what seemed like a few short moments - our trip was over. It was a great time

If you want to see more pics - check my facebook.

LONDON - PART ONE

2007-11-05T20:46:00.000-05:00

I finally have some time to post about my trip to London.

Mariah and I made our way to the airport, and we were called by US airways, to inform us our flight out of MHT was delayed and we would miss our flight to London. There was an earlier flight, if we could make it - we could be sure to connect in PHL, and make it to London. I had to drive 85 to 90 mph to get to the airport,

thankfully Mike and Germaine were able to arrange so we could drop our car, and run through the airport. We then were grounded just a few feet before takeoff, and that is where we sat for 2.5 hours. We then sat on the runway in PHL, and barely made our connecting flight to London.

We picked up our rental car, and began the first leg of our crazy journey. We drove West, and just focused on the road - the opposite side of the road. It was raining and the traffic was horrific, but we made it to our first tourist spot. The one place I was dying to visit, ever since I can remember. Stonehenge.

It truly was a beautiful thing. We did not enter in, because we still needed to drive to the hotel in Nottingham, England. We drove and watched the countryside, and enjoyed the conversation and funny British radio. Along the way, we decided to stop and find some food. What better place to get the first Fish N' Chips. Quite yummy. We then drove for a long time, due to traffic - finally arrived at our hotel.

The next day we made our way to Ashby de la Zouche Castle. We bought and OVP (visitors pass) there fore we were able to get into any English Heritage center. We walked around the castle and had so much fun. We both we groped by an Englishman from York - yes quite the friendly man.

We drove down the road to visit Kenilworth Castle, and walked around the ruins of that castle, which were massive and impressive. We had lunch in the old stables and were able to sneak some pictures of the House, where cameras were not allowed - yes - I am such a rebel.

We drove around and admired the views from all sides, and went to visit ASDA - aka Walmart. We came back to the hotel, and went to find a great dinner, but we were reluctant to find anything, so we got burgers from a roadside trailer - which were great. We spent the rest of the evening, planning our next day so we could visit all the places.

We drove to Leichester and visited the Jewry Wall (Roman Bath ruin), then drove to Kirby Hall. This hall is half in ruins and the other half is being restored to its original state. This hall was by far the most impressive of the structures we saw. While roaming the grounds, I was followed by a certain peacock, who developed a certain fondness for me. I was rather frightened, but I was reassured when I got back into the car.

We drove from there to Burghley House, which is an 87 room mansion, and is still inhabited by Royals. We walked the grounds, inside and both of the two gardens. This house is where parts of The Davinci Code and the newer version of Pride and Prejudice were filmed. We drove back to the hotel, swinging by Belvoir Castle for a quick view from the base of this massive castle. We packed and geared up for our drive back into the city of London.

PART TWO COMING SOON!!!!

I'm Back

2007-10-06T21:56:00.001-04:00

I got back late Thursday evening, and I am struggling with jet lag. I am sleeping 10-11 hours a night, and still feel like I have been run over by a massive truck.

I will post some highlights once my brain is fully functioning.

It was a great trip and so many funny things happened, and countless memories to cherish.

a rough guess

2007-09-24T18:18:00.000-04:00

The long awaited trip has final approached it final days before I head off to Great Britain. Mariah -my travel buddy - will be going with me - to explore the wonderful country. Here is a rough itinerary for my trip - I will have no phone and limited email - I will check my blog once I return.

Thursday - Sept. 27 - 5:55 pm - Flight leaves Manchester, NH
8:25 pm - Flight leaves Philly for London
Friday - Sept . 28 9:35 am - Flight arrives in London, UK

This whole day we will be driving - yes driving - around to see the sights of the countryside. Mariah are going to be visiting Stonehenge, Farnham Castle, and other sites along the way to the Nottingham Hotel.

Saturday Sept. 29 - We will be driving to either Scotland or Wales - and seeing the sights along the way.

Sunday - Sept. 30 - Whatever we did not see the day before - we will see today.

Monday - we drive back into London, and check into our hotel which is one block from Hyde Park and less than a mile from Buckingham.

Tuesday and Wednesday - will be spent seeing the sights of the city - one of which is the theatre where Wicked- my favorite - is playing. We will also see all the typical sights anyone should see when visiting London.

Thursday - Oct. 4 - 10:35 am - Flight leaves London
6:35 pm - Flights arrives in Manchester, NH

Can't wait to share all my stories with all of you.

Uber Excited!

2007-09-19T14:43:00.001-04:00

One Week From Tomorrow - I will be on my way to London. YIPPEEEEE

3 Weeks - 2 Days - 1 hour

2007-09-04T11:12:00.000-04:00

Ok - so it is a silly title, but ironically - that is the exact time I will be leaving my house to drive to the airport for .....LONDON....

I am so excited - I have been counting down the days for a while, and now that the final stretch is here- I don't know if I can take it.

Mariah - who is going with me -and I have been finalizing our plans for the past few weeks, and we are both thrilled at all the things we are going to be able to see and do while we are there.

WE have decided the best way to see the countryside - is to explore it ourselves. We are going to be renting a car for three days and be staying outside of the city in order to see more of the country. There will be tons of pictures to see once I return - I will keep you posted on any exciting changes that may happen from now until then.

Cheerio!

liberation

2007-07-26T09:53:00.000-04:00

I recently heard this song, and it perfectly describes me and my life. Ultimate freedom.

Here's the thing we started off friends
It was cool but it was all pretend
Since you've been gone
You dedicated you took the time
Wasn't long till I called you mine
Since you've been gone
And all you'd ever hear me say Is how I pictured me with you
That's all you'd ever hear me say

But since you've been gone
I can breathe for the first time
Im so movin on Thanks to you Now I get What I want
Since you've been gone

How can I put it? you put me on
I even fell for that stupid love song
Since you've been gone
How come I never hear you say
I just wanna be with you
I guess you never felt that way

But since you've been gone
I can breathe for the first time
Im so movin on
Thanks to you Now I get I get what I want
Since you've been gone

You had your chance you blew it
Out of sight, out of mind
Shut your mouth I just can't take it
Again and again and again and again

Since you've been gone
I can breathe for the first time
Im so movin on
Thanks to you

I get what I want.........since you've been gone.

my new job

2007-06-24T20:44:00.001-04:00

I thought I would post some pictures of the home where I work, I am here for the night and I am just about to head off to bed, so what better time to blog,. I can't show you the girls' rooms, but there are four of them. Hope you enjoyed the tour.

Apology...due to nature of my so-called life.

2007-06-09T21:22:00.000-04:00

So as many of you know, I have been hard at work with my new job, and I can't tell you - a dramatic change has occurred. I have been working at my job since May 21, and i have a confession to make.....I am loving it. My stress level has dramaticly decreased. My hours are not the typical 9-5, but I am not the 9-5 type of girl. I am working some overnights, by doing this, I get at extra stipend - which helps in the long run. I am enjoying getting to know the girls and developing relationships with each one of them, being able to provide guidedance to each one of them, and be there for them. I also have been able to attend trainings which can further my endeavors to get my Masters in social work. I took some training on Abuse, Mental Illness, and Fetal Alcohal Syndrome. I also have been able to attend court hearings, Family Team Meetings, and be a part of the Child protective system.

Broading my mind, desires and dreams. It is a wonderful and liberating feeling.

new me!

2007-05-15T16:16:00.000-04:00

New Job

New Car

New Me

I am so excited.

NEW JOB!!!!

2007-05-04T10:10:00.000-04:00

Yes- folks it is true...as of may 18th....I will no longer be working for the State of Maine...I have been offered a position with St. Andre's Group Home for unwed mothers...I will be working with them and training them. The pay, benefits, and driving time the same...they will also pay for me to go back to school - if I so chose. I gave my 2 week notice today - I am so excited...

back to life...back to reality!

2007-04-25T13:24:00.000-04:00

I went to visit my doctor yesterday, and nerves were on the shaky side. I was nervous about getting the staples out as the pain of one ripping out was enough for me for a lifetime.

I was in and out of the dr.'s office in 7 minutes. I only felt one of the staples being removed, and the remaining nine- I didn't even feel- which was a huge sigh of relief.

I no longer have to see my doctor, unless I develop and bizarre side effects.

I am free from staples, sickness, and ready to live my life again.

staples......

2007-04-24T12:35:00.000-04:00

So - yes I am less than an hour away from having my 10 staples removed.

10 you say...I thought you had eleven.

I did up until this morning, when my lovely shirt got caught and ripped one out.

EEEh Gads.

it is finished.

2007-04-18T10:27:00.000-04:00

In case you didn't already know- I under went Gallbladder surgery on Thursday, and my doctors state - " It was needed and a success." I went into the hospital in the morning- after a long night of not eating or drinking- or sleeping - I laid on the stretcher- awaiting my IV and loopey medicine. I felt great after that medicine - let me tell you. I was taken into the OR - and was told to take some deap breaths - which I couldn't do for some reason, and they had to push down on my throat to open up my airway. I thought I was going to meet jesus - the whole light at the end of the tunnel thing. I awoke in a fair amount of pain - and after three doses or morphine - I was comfortable.

Dr O'Connor came into see me- and stated my gallbladder was white and covered with scar tissue. In case you didn't know, gall bladders are supposed to be yellowish green - not white- so she was glad she took it out when she did.

I was discharged and went home to sleep the day away. I found something out - if you don't think you need sleep - you are lying to yourself - I slept for almost five days straight - because I needed it - rest and time away from people.

The picture above is my actual gall bladder :)

i am back at work - working partial days for this week, and will be back full time next week.

Thanks to all who were thinking of me - the prayers helped.

the saga coninues....

2007-04-09T13:44:00.000-04:00

As many of you know, the past year has been a whirlwind of medical problems for me. I was diagnosed with mono, then had the appendix out, diagnosed with allergy to milk products, and eye surgery to fix the "lazy eye." Although for the past three months or so, I have been feeling the greatest I have been in years, something hasn't felt right. My stomach was getting to the point - where I could not tolerate certain foods, as I have been able to in the past.

Somethings- I have never been able to eat - spicy foods and highly acidic foods - these just make me feel awful, and in the end - I am sick for the rest of the night. SO - I cut these foods out of my diet, which wasn't hard to do, b/c I have never liked them.

I also have not been able to tolerate lately, high-fatty foods. I am not a big fan of fast food - so this one has been easy, but cutting out things suck as Chinese Food and Dairy Queen - has been absolute torture. So- I had enough. Too many trips to the bathroom, and too many times going without to reduce the risk of being sick.

I went to the Dr's 3 weeks ago- and the verdict is in.....gallbladder! I have a non-functioning gall-bladder. What does this mean?? Most gallbladders work as a filter between your liver and large intestine. Since mine is not doing what it should be - I have been sick. Normal gall bladders shoot bile from the bile ducts to the large intestine, mine...deposits the remains back into the small intestine, and as the result of the damage - back into my stomach - hence the reason - for puking almost everyday.

Solution...it needs to come out, and it is - April 12th - Thursday. The doctors- feel it should bring some instant relief, but don't be shocked if I remain sick for a few weeks while my body adjusts.

It is a day surgery, so in and out. And so goes another page in the saga of Meegan.

Please pray all goes well - they are planning laparoscopic, which is in and out - but depending on the damage - I could be laid up for 6 weeks. :(

The storm.

2007-04-05T12:33:00.000-04:00

As many of you have heard, Maine was pummeled with snow last night, and 96, 000 people were left without power, including my house. The power went out around 2am, and is not even close to being fixed. With no power - no heat, no hot water, and no phones. really- I truley love my state.

This was the scene on the way to work, I travel a mere 15 miles, and the journey took 50 minutes.

This was the snowfall total at 3 am - when I was out shoveling!

This was the scene for a majority of the roads in my town and all of the surrounding areas.

So you get the drift....I am done with snow.

oh the saddness.....

2007-04-04T11:08:00.000-04:00

I am not a happy camper. I woke up this morning, and sitnkin' snow

And there is more coming tonight. Eh Gads. Where is Spring???

La, Dave and Arianna

2007-03-22T12:41:00.000-04:00

As many of you already know, my dear friend Laura and her husband Dave have been facing a hard trial with the birth of their new baby girl--Arianna Beth Siegrist.

Arianna was diagnosed on Sunday (the morning after her birth) with right pulmonary artery displacement. They've been at Geisinger Hospital since Monday and have meet with the pediatric cardiologist who will be performing Arianna's open heart surgery. The surgery will begin tomorrow at 7:30am and finish mid-afternoon. it will consist of the doctors opening her chest, cutting through the breast bone, adding cadaver tissue to her tiny pulmenary artery and re-routing the artery. She'll be surviving on the heart and lung machine through the surgery and will need a blood transfusion when it's over.The hardest part will be the recovery. Dave and Laura will be unable to hold Arianna for up to 14 days, while her body stablizes with her newly working heart. Please pray for Laura and for Dave. They are doing ok and are encouraged by all the people who they know are praying for them.

changes of weather

2007-03-15T16:02:00.000-04:00

We go from having two days in a row

when the weather is 70 degrees and gorgeous,

and for the weekend ahead....

8 to 14 inches of snow. I hate my State!

Starry Starry Night

2007-03-09T13:25:00.000-05:00

Recently, I have been catching my brain up on some classic songs I love, and this one is currently on repeat in my cd player.

Sally - I think of you because of the poster on our wall. I miss you

Vincent

By josh groban

Starry, starry night

Paint your palette blue and gray

Look out on a summer’s day

With eyes that know the darkness in my soul

Shadows on the hills

Sketch the trees and daffodils

Catch the breeze and the winter chills

In colors on the snowy linen land

Now I understand

What you tried to say to me

How you suffered for your sanity

How you tried to set them free

They would not listen

They did not know how

Perhaps they’ll listen now

Starry, starry night

Flaming flowers that brightly blaze

Swirling clouds in violet haze

Reflect in Vincent’s eyes of China blue

Colors changing hue

Morning fields of amber grain

Weathered faces lined in pain

Are soothed beneath the artist’s loving hand

Now I understand

what you tried to say to me

How you suffered for your sanity

And how you tried to set them free

They would not listen

They did not know how

Perhaps they’ll listen now

For they could not love youBut still your love was true

And when no hope was left in sight

On that starry, starry night

You took your life as lovers often do

But I could have told you, Vincent

This world was never meant for

one as beautiful as you

Starry, starry night

Portraits hung in empty halls

Frameless heads on nameless walls

With eyes that watch the world and can’t forget

Like the strangers that you’ve met

The ragged men in ragged clothes

The silver thorn of bloody rose

Lie crushed and broken on the virgin snow

Now I think I know

What you tried to say to me

And how you suffered for your sanity

And how you tried to set them free

They would not listen

They’re not listening still

Perhaps they never will

Africa

2007-02-28T08:57:00.000-05:00

Back in 2000, I went to Kenya with a group from my college. It was truly the best experience of my life. I have always wanted to go back and re-visit the places- where I really felt my heart change. The above picture was taken after a Safari with the girls ni my cabin group. After the Safari- we went to the Restaurant and had a vast variety of food- which was great - all kinds of different animals.

Below is journal entry to summarize my heart.

I am closer to my dream

Close your eyes Imagine me

I can see it My dream is within my reach

My dream is real, this I do believe

Just a glimpse into the future,

peeking through the light of a moon

I am there, I am here

I am a dream fulfilledI used to be afraid to dream

I never believed that a dream could come true

But, now I do It has happened to me

I have begun my journey

I am closer to my dream

Close your eyes Imagine me

My dream has become... a reality.

Grammy Alice

2007-02-20T11:43:00.000-05:00

Alice LaRose, 83, passed away peacefully February 13 after a brief illness. She was born in Whitefield NH on April 16, 1923 to the late Roy and Ethel (Lindsey) Brown.

She was one of seven children. She grew up loving life and enjoying people and places where she called home. Alice worked for many years at the former Allied Shoe Company and Sprague Electric.

Alice married William LaRose in 1949 and they moved to Sanford, where she lived for the remainder of her life. In her younger years she enjoyed traveling to places like Puerto Rico and Hawaii. She always had a love for going to the beach and truly enjoyed farm life.

Alice loved to knit and cook, and she has passed on her legacy through her many skills and talents, although no one can duplicate her pork pie, fudge or biscuits. Alice was always there for people and willing to help anyone at anytime. She will be dearly missed.

She is survived by her two children, Ronald LaRose and Irene Adams both of Sanford. Her brother Floyd Brown of Bethleham, NH, her seven grandchildren, Bill LaRose of Sanford, Christopher LaRose of Shapleigh, Lori Williams of Acton, Rae Smith of Sanford, Marc J. Waterhouse of Sanford, Justin and Isaac LaRose of Sanford, also her five great-grandchildren, Noah and Kallie LaRose of Shapleigh, Clayton and Brooke Williams of Acton and Grace Smith of Sanford, and countless people who considered her to be their ‘gram’.

snow

2007-02-15T14:00:00.000-05:00

As many of my friends have been experiencing whis week, we got hit with the biggest snow storm of this winter. Maine has been very fortunate, as the biggest snowfall thus far had only dropped a mere 7 inches- which believe me is small.

All week long, we have been hearing about the pending blizzed conditions and the large amounts of snow fall which have been sweeping the nation. We also knew this blizzard would make its final stop in Maine. All of the weathermen in Maine have been giving several different reports, some were saying 6 to 12 inches- which is nothing for us Mainers and other people were saying 18 to 24 inches- which is a wee bit on the dumping side.

So we all drove to work- in the snow and the plows were out, because for this storm- they were ready for this storm. The enitre State was shutting down, because the snow was falling at about 3 inches an hour, and the wind was blowing at 40mph. WHITEOUT conditions. Since I work for the State- Governor Baldacci- decided in regards to our safety- he would close the offices, statewide, effective 12:30pm- just as the eye of the storm was approaching- how noble.

Any way- I came home, put on my jammies, and bundled up for the storm approaching. My mom within the last 6 weeks had had a total knee replacement, so shoveling for her is out of the question, which leaves me to shovel- all the snow.

Well- last night after I took my shower and warmed up from being out in the wind and spitting sleet and snow, I was ready for bed. Just as I was walking to looking out the window, and the mean and nasty plow came by, not once- but twice- leaving me another massive pile of snow to clear. Man was I pissed.

Well- after all is said and done- 14 inches later- the sun is shining and wind is still blowing and we are hopefully done for a while.

sweet dreams, little man

2007-02-13T09:24:00.000-05:00

While talking on the phone, gaven and i were reminded of a beautiful song by the dixie chicks. Each time either of us hears it- we think of each other, and we flash back to college days.

Dragon tales and the "water is wide"

Pirate's sail and lost boys fly

Fish bite moonbeams every night

And I love you

Godspeed, little man

Sweet dreams, little man

Oh my love will fly to you

each night on angels wings

GodspeedSweet dreams

The rocket racer's all tuckered out

Superman's in pajamas on the couch

Goodnight moon, we'll find the mouse

And I love you

Godspeed, little manSweet dreams, little man

Oh my love will fly to you

each night on angels wings

Godspeed, Sweet dreams

God bless mommy and match box cars

God bless dad and thanks for the stars

God hears "Amen," wherever we are

And I love you Godspeed, little man

Sweet dreams, little man

Oh my love will fly to you each night on angels wings

Godspeed, Sweet dreams

CHANGE

2007-02-05T08:48:00.000-05:00

For those who may have noticed the change in my blog- I am not wallowing in self pity or thinking of jumping from a cliff. God is changing me for the better, and I am thrilled.

He has been a source of comfort during some tough days with work and life, and I am thankful for His unfailing love.

I am also amazed to see how strong He really is- I mean I know the whole- "all-powerful" thing- but for me to truly feel Him- is one of the most amazing feelings I have ever felt.

The art of progress is to preserve order amid change, and to preserve change amid order. Life refuses to be embalmed alive. The more prolonged the halt in some unrelieved system of order, the greater the crash of the dead society. - Unknown

Changes of season

2007-02-05T08:38:00.000-05:00

Most of you know- Gaven moved to London back in the beginning of January to take a new job. Before leaving- I was able to visit him down in South Carolina. Since Gav and I - try to see each other, at least once a year- we have arranged a trip of a lifetime, and since he lives in London.....

I am going to London!!!!

The current plans are for September 27 thru October 5th. I will purchasing my tickets within the next week. We are both thrilled to be abel to have this chance. It is sure to be.... jolly good fun!

trying to fix

2007-02-02T08:48:00.000-05:00

When you try your best but you don't succeed

When you get what you want but not what you need

When you feel so tired but you can't sleep

Stuck in reverse

And the tears come streaming down your face

When you lose something you can't replace

When you love someone but it goes to waste

Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home

And ignite your bones

And I will try to fix you

And high up above or down below

When you're too in love to let it go

But if you never try you'll never know

Just what you're worth

2007-01-26T09:30:00.000-05:00

High temps in Maine are expected to reach - 2 degrees - with a wind chill of -20 degrees- so making it....COLD OUT SIDE!!!!

I really can’t stayBut baby it’s cold outside

I’ve got to go ’wayBut baby it’s cold outside

This evening has beenBeen hoping that you’d drop in

So very niceI’ll hold your hands they’re just like ice.

My mother will start to worryBeautiful what’s your hurry?

And father will be pacing the floorListen to the fireplace roar

So really I’d better scurryBeautiful please don’t hurry

Well maybe just a half a drink morePut some music on while I pour.

The neighbors might thinkBut baby it’s bad out there

Say what’s in this drinkNo cabs to be had out there

I wish I knew howYour eyes are like starlight now

To break this spellI’ll take your hat your hair looks swell.

I oughta say no no no sirMind if I move a bit closer?

At least I’m gonna say that I triedWhat’s the sense of hurting my pride

I really can’t stayOh baby don’t hold out

Ah, but it’s cold outsideBaby it’s cold outside

I simply must goBut baby it’s cold outside

The answer is noOoh baby it’s cold outside

The welcome has beenHow lucky that you dropped in

So nice and warmLook out the window at that storm.

My sister will be suspiciousMy your lips look delicious

My brother will be there at the doorWaves upon a tropical shore

My maiden aunt’s mind is viciousGosh your lips are delicious

Well maybe just a half-a-drink moreNever such a blizzard before.

I’ve got to get homeBut baby you’d freeze out there

Say lend me a combIt’s up to your knees out there

You’ve really been grandI thrill when you touch my hand

But don’t you seeHow can you do this thing to me?

There’s bound to be talk tomorrowThink of my lifelong sorrow

At least there will be plenty impliedIf you caught pneumonia and died

I really can’t stayGet over that old doubt,

Ah, but it’s cold outsideBaby it’s cold outside

It’s cold out side.It’s cold out side

some things

2007-01-24T16:47:00.000-05:00

Some things are meant to be, the tide turning endlessly,

the way it takes hold of me, no matter what I do,

and some things will never die, the promise of who you are,

the memories when I am far from you.

2007-01-24T16:44:00.000-05:00

Life is a series of things to let go of-our friends and loved ones, our children as they grow, our youth, our perceptions of ourselves. In my own life, I have found myself having to let go more these past few weeks than ever before.

When I was a young child and began to lose my baby teeth, my new teeth always grew in before the baby ones had fallen out. In thinking about letting go this month, I have not been able to shake this image. It reminds me that I have always experienced loss with some kind of gain. And when my teeth had finally let go and fallen out--or as was often the case, when I was sent to the dentist and had them pulled--I would take the precious tooth, place it under my pillow and wait for the Tooth Fairy to take it away. The Tooth Fairy would always leave a gift in its place, and the cycle of newness sprouting (my new teeth coming through), the old falling away (the baby teeth finally coming out), and a transformation taking place (the tooth turning into a gift), was born.

When we are children, and someone tells us to “let go,” it is usually in reference to something material, and when we let go, we can either feel empty, as if we are being deprived of something, or we can feel full, knowing that we have allowed someone to have that something, and s/he must really need it. As adults, “letting go” can still leave us feeling empty or full. Both feelings may occur simultaneously. Ultimately, letting go will allow us to feel free, unburdened, healed, happy, even joyous.

white fairyland

2007-01-23T09:28:00.000-05:00

Its a white fairylandthat brings back memories of long ago, its a white fairyland, silent and magical, a land of pure white unblemished snowIts a white fairylandso softly and silently, does the snow fallthis white fairyland, enchants me, and has me simply enthralled.tall green trees, bowed down humblyunder the weight of the amassed snow, white magic as far as the eye can see, white and only white, on the rolling hills, high and lowthese tall white sentinelsproudly standing guard in the night, overseeing fondly, the children gambollinghaving fun in a snowball fight.and this white fairyland, that has appeared overnight, sets to shame all the coloursand proves the might of white.I have no words, that can aptly describe, the beauty of this scene, painted byGodso I will just just say thanks, and drink in this scene, another marvellous composition by the Lord.

if

2007-01-18T11:02:00.000-05:00

If
by Rudyard Kipling

If you can keep your head when all about you Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, But make allowance for their doubting too; I
f you can wait and not be tired by waiting, Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or, being hated, don't give way to hating, And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master; I
f you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with triumph and disaster And treat those two imposters just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with wornout tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew To serve your turn long after they are gone, And so hold on when there is nothing in you Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on";

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings - nor lose the common touch; If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you; If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute With sixty seconds' worth of distance run -
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it, And - which is more - you'll be a Man my son!

Made It!!

2007-01-17T11:23:00.000-05:00

I just got an email from Gaven, for those of you who didn't know- he moved to London, England. He will be there for about three years with his job. He will be able to come home- but it will be a little harder. Once I have his permanent address- I will post that as well.

awakening

2007-01-10T15:33:00.000-05:00

My Awakening

A time comes in your life when you finally get it. When in the midst of all your fears and insanity you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out - ENOUGH!
Enough fighting and crying or struggling to hold on. And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum, your sobs begin to subside, you shudder once or twice, you blink back your tears and through a mantle of wet lashes you begin to look at the world through new eyes.

This is your awakening. You realize that it's time to stop hoping and waiting for something to change, or for happiness, safety and security to come galloping over the next horizon. You come to terms with the fact that he is not Prince Charming and you are not Cinderella and that in the real world there aren't always fairy tale endings (or beginnings for that matter). and that any guarantee of "happily ever after" must begin with you, and in the process a sense of serenity is born of acceptance.

You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect, and that not everyone will always love, appreciate or approve of who or what you are and its OK. (They are entitled to their own views and opinions.) And you learn the importance of loving and championing yourself, and in the process a sense of newly found confidence is born of self-approval.

You stop bitching and blaming other people for the things they did to you (or didn't do for you) and you learn that the only thing you can really count on is the unexpected. You learn that not everyone will always be there for you, and that it's not always about you. So, you learn to stand on your own and to take care of yourself and in the process a sense of safety and security is born of self-reliance.

You stop judging and pointing fingers, and you begin to accept people as they are, and to over look their shortcomings and human frailties and in the process a sense of peace and contentment is born of forgiveness.

You realize that much of the way you view yourself, and the world around you, is a result of all the messages and opinions that have been ingrained into your psyche. And you begin to sift through all the crap you've been fed about how you should behave, how you should look, how much you shouldn't weigh, what you should wear, where you should shop, what you should drive, how and where you should live, what you should do for a living, who you should sleep with, who you should marry, what you should expect of a marriage, the importance of having and raising children, or what you owe your parents.

You learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view. And you begin reassessing and redefining who you are and what you really stand for. You learn the difference between wanting and needing, and you begin to discard the doctrines and values you've outgrown, or should never have bought into to begin with, and in the process you learn to go with your instincts. You learn to distinguish between guilt and responsibility, and the importance of setting boundaries and learning to say NO. You learn that the only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry, and that martyrs get burned at the stake.

Then you learn about love. Romantic love and familial love. How to love, how much to give in love, when to stop giving, and when to walk away. You learn not to project your needs or your feelings onto a relationship. You learn that you will not be more beautiful, more intelligent, more lovable, or important because of the man or woman on your arm or the child that bears your name.

You learn to look at relationships as they really are and not as you would have them be. You stop trying to control people, situations, and outcomes. You learn that just as people grow and change, so it is with love. and you learn that you don't have the right to demand love on your terms. Just to make you happy. And, you learn that 'alone' does not mean lonely.

And you look in the mirror and come to terms with the fact that you will never be a size 5 or a perfect 10 and you stop trying to compete with the image inside your head and agonizing over how you "stack up." You also stop working so hard at putting feelings aside, smoothing things over, and ignoring your needs.

You learn that feelings of entitlement are perfectly OK. . . and that it is your right to want things that you want. and that sometimes it is necessary to make demands. You come to the realization that you deserve to be treated with love, kindness, sensitivity, and respect, and you will not settle for less. And you allow only the hands of a lover who cherishes you, to glorify you with his or her touch. and in the process you internalize the meaning of self-respect.

And you learn that your body really is your temple. You begin eating a balanced diet, drinking more water, and taking more time to exercise. You learn that fatigue diminishes the spirit and can create doubt and fear, so you take more time to rest. And, just as food fuels the body, laughter fuels our soul, so you take more time to laugh and to play.

You learn that, for the most part, in life you get what you believe you deserve. and that much of life is a self-fulfilling prophecy. You learn that anything worth achieving is worth working for, and that wishing for something to happen is different from working toward making it happen. More importantly, you learn that in order to achieve success, you need direction, discipline, and perseverance.

You also learn that no one can do it all alone and its OK to risk asking for help. You learn that the only thing you must truly fear is the great robber baron of all time: FEAR itself. You learn to step right into and through your fears, because you know that whatever happens you can handle it, and to give in to fear is to give away the right to live life on your terms.

You learn to fight for your life and not to squander it living under a cloud of impending doom. You learn that life isn't always fair, you don't always get what you think you deserve, and that sometimes bad things happen to unsuspecting, good people. On these occasions you learn not to personalize things. You learn that God isn't punishing you or failing to answer your prayers. It's just life happening. And you learn to deal with evil in its most primal state - the ego.

You learn that negative feelings such as anger, envy, and resentment must be understood and redirected, or they will suffocate the life out of you and poison the universe that surrounds you.

You learn to admit when you are wrong and to build bridges instead of walls. You learn to be thankful and to take comfort in many of the simple things we take for granted, things that millions of people upon the earth can only dream about a full refrigerator, clean running water, a soft warm bed, a long hot shower. Slowly, you begin to take responsibility for yourself. by yourself, and you try to make yourself a promise to never betray yourself and to never ever settle for less than your heart's desire. And you hang a wind chime outside your window so you can listen to the wind. And you make it a point to keep smiling, to keep trusting, and to stay open to every wonderful possibility.

Finally, with courage in your heart and with God by your side, you take a stand, you take a deep breath, and you begin to design the life you want to live as best as you can

the Gala

2007-01-10T12:22:00.000-05:00

Thursday Night, January 4th- I was invited to the Inaguration Gala for Governor John Baldacci. Yes- me- at a black tie event. It was a fun time, no free drinks :) and we stayed over at the Holiday Inn- and took the next day off of work. All in all- good time was had by all.

This is a picture of Governor and me- a self-portrait. I walked up to him- told him who I was- and snapped a shot. he excalimed, "that's yankee ingenuity for you!"

PS - Alicia- notice the dress!!!

2006-12-13T08:29:00.000-05:00

I am back from my quick and wonderful trip to South Carolina to see Gaven before he heads to London on the 16th of January. It was such a wonderful weekend of Christmas fun and friendship- i have highlighted each moment of the trip.

As you read from my previous post, Maine received snow the morning of my flight out. I was so annoyed with that, and I was just so discouraged at the thought of being stuck in Maine- I could hardly focus on my work in the morning. I made it to the airport, to find- yes my flight was delayed- but the earlier flight to DC - was so delayed- I was able to take off earlier than expected. I love flying (1) - I also love using my camera from the air- to really capture each moment as I fly over things which appear so large, but really are so little when you see them from 30,000 feet.

Once I arrived with all my luggage in tow - Gaven, Joe, and myself- went off to eat at Lieu's - Chinese gourmet rest- so yummy. After that- we went home to begin decorating the tree (2) - mostly I just stood back and watched them put up the lights. I gave them my advice- and it just a few minutes- success! (3) The next day we had to prepare for the Christmas Extravaganza 2006- we made several batches of sugar cookie dough- (4) and we also made lots of different colored icing to use with the cookies. Once people arrived- we started to make multiple batches of sugar cookies - Joe - did the best (5) - and Sylvia made her cookies (6) look like acid trip cookies- so many colors. After the cookies - we had dinner and played a very heated game of charades - Gaven's team one- in a tie breaker- but it was rigged- how to act out the movie "hustler." I mean really!!!

The next day- Gaven and I decided to take the day- and drive around, to see the sights of South Carolina. Our first stop was Gaven's old apartment- just down the road from Clemson- his former place of employment. Second- we drove to Ashtabula- an old plantation home built during the Civil War (7) - the entire house was decorated for the Holidays- so it was so beautiful. After the house- we drove down to see Clemson- a huge school in the South - were Gaven- and his three brothers all attend/attended. The buildings (8) were all so beautiful- and the campus was amazing. They were all geared up for finals - so the campus seemed pretty quiet.

After driving around- we were getting rather on the hungry side- we made out way over to the "farm." (9) We had planned to have dinner with Gav's family- which included Kyle (brother), his girlfriend, Logan (brother) and his girlfriend, and both of his parents. His older brother Brent and his wife- were not able to make it. We had a great time of eating and singing Christmas Carols- and lots of Sweet Tea.

We then drove back to pick up Joe- to go over to Roper Mountain- which is mountain covered in a spectacular light display. All of the lights were so amazing- and you also got a great view of the city of Greenville. (10) After the mountain- we went downtown to see the lights and get a warm cup of coffee. It was a great close to the day and weekend.

I had to get to the airport for 9:30 am for my flight, so we had a quick sappy goodbye- knowing it would be a while until our next meeting. Each time I flew (11) I had these small planes, but I never had to share my seat- which was very nice. I was able to sit by the window, and capture some wonderful moments from the air. Greenville (12) was a great place to visit and would definitely be a great place to vacation again. I had layovers in DC both coming and going- so I was able to have some time for lunch and also had time to read. National Airport in DC- is busy all the time- and I was glad to be first in line for take off (13). While taking off- I was attempting to capture the White House- and I came across the Pentagon (14). By the time- I arrived into the airspace above Maine- the sun was setting on my whirlwind trip to SC (15).

I am so blessed to have been able to go and see Gaven (16)- and I can't wait until London.

much relief

2006-12-09T10:45:00.000-05:00

In case anybody saw the weather, I made it out of Maine- snow bound central and now sit in sunny South Carolina- mind you it is cold- but at least no white stuff.

I had uneventful flights- so I am here.

in my mind....

2006-12-04T10:59:00.000-05:00

In my mind I'm going to Carolina

can't you see the sunshine can't you just feel the moon shining

ain't it just like a friend of mine to hit me from behind and

I'm going to Carolina in my mind

Actually- I am not going in my mind- I am going on Friday.

I fly out of Portland, ME and will land in Greenville, SC - evening.

I will staying with Gaven to visit with him before he heads off to London.

I can't wait......

There ain't no doubt it no ones mind

that friendsips the finest thing around

whisper something soft and kind

hey babe the sky's on fire

I'm dying well ain't I

I'm going to Carolina in my mind

random photos

2006-11-30T11:16:00.000-05:00

While scanning some old photos....I found these great shots of Jeremy and I on the train on the the way home from DC back in May. We were testing out the features of my new camera- multi shots within seconds of each other- and we captured these great moments.

True friends stab you in the front.

Worship...

2006-11-20T10:01:00.000-05:00

As many of you know- there has been a great deal of turmoil going on in my "church". I have been so thankful for the thoughts and prayers from all of you.

God is good.

This past Saturday, all of the families who left the church, got together and had a wonderful time of fellowship. Altogether- with kids- I think there was about 50 people there. It was so wonderful to see these people making a step towards serving God in the right place.

We started the evening with a potluck dinner, and joined together for a blessed time of worship. Each of the songs selected, we so appriopriate for the trials we have had to encounter over the past year or so.

There came a time in the worship, when I couldn't even sing the words- because of the tears that were streaming down my face- I was just in awe- of how wonderful God is.

"You are my desire, no one else will do...

I lay it all down again, to hear you say I'm you're friend.

You're all I want, you're all I've ever needed.

Let me know you are near. "

I just can't tell you how wonderful it felt to be a part of this worship service- God is doing great things- and I can't wait to see where He takes me.

The day...

2006-11-16T16:16:00.000-05:00

So in case you couldn't get the hint- today was my 27th birthday. I can't believe it has been 27 years- I feel younger than that- but I guess- time flies when you are having fun. My cubbie was decorated and I got flowers- altogether a good day. I am going home to a "quiet dinner" with the family- as my mother would say- even though I know different people are coming- she did a good job surprising me. Thanks for all the birthday greetings throughout the day- I miss you all

The Wizard and I

2006-11-14T11:54:00.000-05:00

Many of you- last year for my birthday, my family and friends sent me to NYC to see Wicked. This week leading up to my birthday- was the most excited I had ever been- last year at this time. This year, I have been listening to the music and enjoying it more and more. It is such a blessed musical.

One moment in the show- I was so choked up- and I wanted to share it with you- so you could get the wicked feeling.

__________________________________________

Did that really just happen?Have I actually understood?

This weird quirk I've triedTo suppress or hideIs a talent that couldHelp me meet the WizardIf I make good

So I'll make good:When I meet the WizardOnce I prove my worthAnd then I meet the WizardWhat I've waited for since: since birth!

And with all his Wizard wisdomBy my looks, he won't be blindedDo you think the Wizard is dumb?Or, like Munchkins, so small-minded?No! He'll say to me,"I see who you truly are -A girl on whom I can rely!"And that's how we'll beginThe Wizard and I:

Once I'm with the WizardMy whole life will change'Cuz once you're with the WizardNo one thinks you're strange!No father is not proud of you,No sister acts ashamedAnd all of Oz has to love youWhen by the Wizard you're acclaimedAnd this gift - or this curse - I have insideMaybe at last, I'll know whyWhen we are hand and hand - The Wizard and I!

And one day, he'll say to me, "Elphaba,A girl who is so superior-Shouldn't a girl who's so good insideHave a matching exterior?And since folks here to an absurd degree-Seem fixated on your verdigris Would it be all right by youIf I de-greenify you?

"And though of courseThat's not important to me"All right, why not?" I'll replyOh, what a pair we'll beThe Wizard and I:Yes, what a pair we'll beThe Wizard and...

UnlimitedMy future is unlimitedAnd I've just had a visionAlmost like a prophecyI know - it sounds truly crazyAnd true, the vision's hazy But I swear, someday there'll be A celebration throughout Oz-That's all to do with me!

And I'll stand there with the Wizard-Feeling things I've never felt-And though I'd never show itI'll be so happy, I could melt!And so it will beFor the rest of my lifeAnd I'll want nothing elseTill I dieHeld in such high esteem

When people see me, they will screamFor half of Oz's fav'rite team:

The Wizard And I!

27

2006-11-09T13:54:00.000-05:00

Birthdays are the tolling of

A bell that marks the coming of

A time of festive joy and love,

A time to treasure life and love.
So come and celebrate with me

The circumstance that makes me, me:

The moment when I came to be,

And what I now have come to be

Halloween Pictures - enjoy

2006-11-01T08:03:00.000-05:00

So - Halloween is such a fun holiday, where the kids get to dress up and be whatever they want or be what there parents say. It also hooks in the adults too.

Abbott was a mummy, Maya was a queen, Phoebe was a lady bug, Silas was a dragon, and Grace was Minnie Mouse.

Rae was a vixen kitty and I was a rocker. Enjoy the pics!

A choice.

2006-10-30T09:53:00.000-05:00

As many of you know, my church has been under great turmoil over the past few months. Our leadership has been making steps to becoming a Reformed Church, and shying away from its traditional Baptist views. I am not here to debate the differences between the two, but I am here expressing my huge concern for how it was done. The leadership of my church has taken these major changes, and came in through the back door and is forcing these beliefs from the pulpit and in every area of study the church offers. The leadership has signed our Statement of Faith, yet continues to preach reformed theology.

All of this came to a head this past Thursday night. Based upon the lack of integrity, maturity, and leadership from our church- I have decided to no longer attend my church of 20 years. It was a hard thing to recognize, but knowing there is a better place for me, I am excited about the choices I get to make in the near future. I have been looking for a place where I fit, for the past few months, but haven't found a church - that "suits" me.

Please be in prayer for a group of people from my church- 9 families, which have decided to make this big step towards serving God in a better place. There is a lot of healing to take place with each of these families, and the children which stem from these parents.

God is going to do amazing things- and I am ready.

My Trip!!! Final installment

2006-10-26T08:38:00.000-04:00

After waking up after only a few hours of sleep, it was time to rest and watch - the OC- yeah- a show which I am now addicted to. I was able to catch the whole first season while at Meg's house, and I am finishing up season 2 at home. We had met some nice people at club Aura, so we decided to hook up with them at another club, Club Element. Yeah- we party-

big deal! So we (Marcelas, Ish, Sam, Chitra, Megs and myself) drove up to Ames - a 40 minute drive - and we were all squished in a 5 passenger car- getting to know Megs friends in a whole new light. So we partied, went to Perkins for a late night dinner, and finally made it home aorund 4AM- yet another late night. So we crashed- but only slept for a few hours, b/c of the stinkin' time clock my body has - I wake up everyday- 6:30am - so that means 5:30 - Iowa time- yikes.

So - now time for Sunday- we had dinner scheduled at Kaniuk Hasenda' - so we mustered up enough strength to put ourselves together and drive over to Pleasant Hill , IA- a quaint little spot on the outskirts of Des Moines. It was nice to sit down to a home cooked meal- b/c in Maine- b/c of work being so hectic, I rarely cook for myself- it is just me eating some soup or cereal. Driving back and forth to Pleasant Hill- we spotted lots of things which

were pretty and odd. Copper Creek and the giant cows at the Diary.We swung by were Megs works - ING - and saw the downtown of Des Moines- a quaint little spot to live- I love city life, so anytime I get the chance to walk aorund the downtown of any city- i take the time. Walking with Meg, and having her point out all her "spots" - was such a great time. seeing the sites she always tells me about- now when she tells me a story-and says " oh i went &**" I will know where that place is. Sunday night, my last night in Iowa- we decided to chill with Ish, Sam and Chitra at sports pub, which was nice just to relax and eat. Said my goodbyes to Megs friends, and explained they would always be welcome in Maine- anytime. So they assured me- they would love to come and shake things up a bit. Monday- came too fast- really it did. So we packed my bags in the car, dropped of the Coopster, and headed out to Runnels, IA - to pick up Megs friend, Aaron- who would be joining us for the trip out. We were running a little late- so the trip to the airport- took 1 hr 30 minutes- going 85-90 the whole way- yikes. I made it to the airport- didn't have the chance to put my shoes on after security, and headed out for Chicago, and then back to Manchester. My flights was with no delays at either location- got ok seats on each of the flights. So it was good to be in my own car, driving home- but not so good to be away from Megs. I can't wait until next time, when we get to spend some quality time with each other- wither in Maine, Iowa, London or Cancun. We will have to wait and see what happens.

I highly reccommend taking a vacaction, for people who are overwhelmed with work, and school- one every so often is needed in order to maintain a certain level of sanity. Iowa has a lot to offer- more than just corn by the way.

My trip!!! Part Three

2006-10-26T07:40:00.000-04:00

With the new day came new hope for the early arrival of my bags- I always fly Southwest, and rarely do I check baggage. Each time I do- something happens- tearing of the suitcase and now- no luggage at all- makes one wonder what they do down there. So - to my surprise- the luggage came around 10 am- so I was able to have all my stuff- which is a nice thing when you are living out of a suitcase. So Megs and I spent the day- walking around the mall, seeing the sights- new places completely unknown to me- but home to Megs. So - we had made plans to head out to dinner with Chitra, one of Megs friends from Iowa. I have heard so much about her- i felt like we had already met- but we went to Mac Grill. I just love PASTA- so good, and so full. After that we went out to Drink- which was a let down- loud, and we were able to watch some pretty funny looking people.

I mean imagine- the Russian girlfriend from Rocky IV- remember??? Ok picture her in lime green pants- dancing- Yeah great mental picture huh?? But needless to say- it was wonderful to be in the company of friends in a place which should feel so unfamiliar. After Drink, we headed over to Aura- ready to dance the night away...we walked into a completely empty club- much to our surprise. But shortly there after- we found it to be quite full. Met some nice people- and had a blast. After Aura- we headed over to the Boom Boom Room- yes- that's the name- As we entered the parking lot, we found ourselves in the company of people- who we'd rather not be with so we headed home. Mind you- Boom Boom opens at 2 AM!! I haven't been up that late since college, so I was ready for bed, which came shortly after we made it back to Megs place. Needed to get rested for another day of Iowa Fun.

My trip!!! part 2

2006-10-25T20:12:00.000-04:00

So - I was thrilled to death to see Megs - I was so excited to see her- she is more like my family- my best friend. We drove across the vast plains of Iowa, and if you have never been to Iowa- let me try to explained what you would see that is different than Maine- it has more sky. The fields go on and on- with minimal trees- and no hills. The fields roll, but no hill-hills. We chatted, stopped for ice cream, and just enjoyed the time together. First one the agenda- find some clothes for me to wear to sleep in- and in case- some clothes to wear until the luggage arrives. So we drove around - West Des Moines, Des Moines, Urbandale, and Pleasant Hill - all great places of Meg's life- old houses and new apartments- There are a lot of people in Des Moines - just about 300,000- that is huge compared to Maine's biggest town, Portland with 75,000. With lots of people comes lots of places to live. Des moines is a nice city- small skyline, but a nice place to vacation. We went over and picked up Cooper, Meg's kitty, at her mom's house- and met the parents. I have only met her family once before- and the meeting was brief- so this time- i was able to chat with her mom- while we collected Cooper's things. Now back to Megs place. This is first glimpse, I had of megs place as she kept everything a surprise. i loved it. Just big enough for one and a cat. It was very cozy and homey. We spent the night chatting and watching some episodes of One Tree Hill- a very good show- in case you have never seen it. We went to bed- with plans of relaxing the day away- and seeing more sights of Des Moines and awaiting the arrival of my luggage.

My trip!!! Part One

2006-10-25T18:23:00.000-04:00

So this whole journey started in this cubicle..after working for 50-60 hours a week- I needed a break- I was really going crazy...so with my free plane ticket- I decided to fly and see Megs in Iowa. Megs and I go back to the college days of Thompson- the ghetto. I have known her for that long, and yet never ventured to her home. It was about time- for both her and I.

So I drove over to Manchester to meet Mike at church, so I could park my car, and then hitch a ride to the airport. I checked in without a hitch or delay- so I was excited for this to be under way. I called the necessary people, and boarded my plane. They warned us it would be full flight- so pick a seat and sit down. I picked front row - aisle- awesome seat. I was able to chat with the Flight Attendants, and tooka short snooze enroute to Chicago. Once in Chicago, I had two hours to walk around- test the moving walkways, and find something to eat. I also have people I work with - who use me as a their source of traveling- i.e. they give me money to buy them gifts in each of the places I go. So after shooping- I found my gate- and boarded another plane- again no delays - heading out to Ohama, Nebraska.

So I landed safely- and I was so excited about seeing Megs- i can't even tell you. I exited the plane headed down to Baggage Claim, and was standing there minding my own business when I heard this over the load speaker " Meegan Pratt, please report to the baggage claim office." My first thought was- oops- I left something on the plane. Nope- my luggage decided to take a journey ouf its own and hadn't left Manchester, NH - yet. She assured me, it would be here before the night was over- my problem, I wasn't staying in Nebraska- I was 2 hours away in Des Moines, Iowa- she said it would delivered. So I called Megs- and she was pulling up to the terminal- I almost jumped into the road with my excitement from seeing her driving up to get me- Really- I was so thrilled.

Chicago, Omaha, Iowa- Oh my!!!!

2006-10-04T12:29:00.000-04:00

I am leaving on a jet plane- tomorrow- for a 5 day vacation of fun - with one of the funnest people I know- Megan Kaniuk. I am all packed and ready for the break away from work- and much needed break. I fly out tomorrow, and should return to Manchester, NH - Monday night. I am so very excited to see Megs, it has been since February- my last vacation- since I have seen Megs, and since I earn frequent flier miles, I earned a free trip to any Southwest airport- my not go with the most exspensive- since it was free :) I fly out of Manchester, have a layover in Chicago, and land in Omaha, Nebraska. Ohama?? but doesn't Megs live in Iowa?? Southwest doesn't fly to Iowa- so closest option- Ohama- less than a 2 hr drive to Des Moines. We will be relaxing and enjoying the time we spend together, until our next vacation. We are both so excited we are having a hard time focusing on the tasks of today. Hence the reason for the blog. I will flying back through Chicago, on my way home on Monday. My cell phone works in Chicago, Ohama, and Iowa- and all the places in the middle. So - for those of you who check this more often than I update it- I will post more later- and all the fun things one can do in Iowa. We are under the 24 hr mark, and since we have been waiting since February- the countdown is going faster and faster. See you all in 5 days!!!

I'm sick.

2006-09-26T13:31:00.000-04:00

I cannot go to school today,"Said little Peggy Ann McKay.
"I have the measles and the mumps,A gash, a rash and purple bumps.
My mouth is wet, my throat is dry,I'm going blind in my right eye.
My tonsils are as big as rocks,I've counted sixteen chicken pox
And there's one more--that's seventeen,And don't you think my face looks green?
My leg is cut--my eyes are blue--It might be instamatic flu.
I cough and sneeze and gasp and choke,I'm sure that my left leg is broke--
My hip hurts when I move my chin,My belly button's caving in,
My back is wrenched, my ankle's sprained,My 'pendix pains each time it rains.
My nose is cold, my toes are numb.I have a sliver in my thumb.
My neck is stiff, my voice is weak,I hardly whisper when I speak.
My tongue is filling up my mouth,I think my hair is falling out.
My elbow's bent, my spine ain't straight,My temperature is one-o-eight.
My brain is shrunk, I cannot hear,There is a hole inside my ear.
I have a hangnail, and my heart is--what?What's that? What's that you say?
You say today is. . .Saturday?G'bye, I'm going out to play!"

fog and frost

2006-09-20T18:34:00.000-04:00

fog1[fog, fawg]-a state of mental confusion or unawareness; daze; stupor: noun, verb

Ok- so I feel I have withdrawn from the world. Aside from working from one job to another and sleeping when I get the chance- I am living in this fog. Trying to explain it to people- I can't. I don't know where it is steming from. I am growing as far as my relationship with Christ, and that encourages me. I am pursuing my dream of becoming a professional photographer, booking up weekend after weekend. I sit here and type I am drawn to this fog. Family life is good- kids are great- my best friends are being supportive as I walk through this fog, offering their support along the way. I stand admidst the fog- stepping forward.

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stoodAnd looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;Though as for that, the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally layIn leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!Yet knowing how way leads on to way,I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sighSomewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—I took the one less traveled by,And that has made all the difference

Robert Frost-

thoughts and directions

2006-08-23T10:17:00.000-04:00

Over the past few months, I have really had the time to reflect on a lot of issues with my own self. I hope I can explain it - and you can all understand what God has been doing in my heart.

First- for a long time now- the leadership in my church has been something with which I strongly disagree. Many things- many different issues. All of the things came to a head the week before VBS, with the final straw- changing the locks on the church to prevent me from accessing the church whenever needed. I knew I needed to find some place new- to worship, to express, and to just be me. I decided- after attending my church for 21 years- I would be finding some place new- for me. I was not being driven out- I know this is where God was taking me- and I was ready. I have been taking some time away- and really seeking out the right place to worship, and I am thrilled to see where I end up- I know I will be able to be part of a family again.

Secondly- I have been blessed with a core group of friends, who I love and cherish more than anything. I am encouraged time I can spend with them- wither short or days worth- the time is precious. I was able to spend 8 days with Megan in February for vacation, after not seeing her for 2 years- those 8 days proved to be a starting over point for the both of us. I have re-connected with her, in a way, that I can not describe with words. Blessed by her life and encouragement on a daily basis- and for that- I am better person. I also have two guys friends- Jeremy and Gaven- who are like my own family, and have been there on countless occasions over the past year. Jeremy- we have a unique history. Memories, sadness, and moments of rage- but each of those moments- I count a blessing. Each time I spend with Jer- is a "blast." We have been able to be more real with each other, as each day passes, and I am grateful. With Gaven- we have bonded in a unique way- no one understands except the two of us- and I am so encouraged by him- as my "brother." I was able to see him back in July for the day. Although it was short- every minute made a memory.

Lastly- I have made some dramatic changes in the way I see life. I am happy living as a single woman- with the world at her feet. I am looking into options of becoming a foster parent, and eventually starting a foster home of my own. I have been reaching for my dreams of being a photographer, by having three seniors portraits and a wedding in the upcoming month. I am making steps to getting an online portfolio established, and I am writing. There are not enough hours in the day I am finding to write what I want- but the times I get- are wonderful. I have been asking God to give me peace in all my choices and He has.

I am moving forward, His hand guiding mine, and am ready to see where we go in the up coming months.

Visions through a fuzzy lens

2006-08-22T10:53:00.000-04:00

Many of you know- I underwent eye surgery on Friday, August 18 - to correct the lazy eye I have had since childhood. The surgery itself was 25 minutes with no complications- and the recovery is... Nothing like he told me. My doctor, Dr Berman, explained I would be back to normal the following day after the procedure and I would be able to manage my pain with Tylenol and Advil. For those of you who have had surgery on eyes- there is so much more pain than they tell you about. I felt as those I had a 700lb man sitting on my left eyebrow having a picnic. I couldn't get my eye open- so after a few rounds of morphine- I was happy and pain free. I came home the same day- and was in my bed to rest up for the next few days.
Some of my observations I came across while in this blurry state were:
1. When someone tells you- You can't lift anything- you realize at that moment- there are so many things you lift- small things like purses or pitchers of water. I couldn't even bend over and pick up Gracie- even when she says- 'Mimi- up- please' can we say torment.

2. If you eye is out of commission- you might as well- plan on having your whole body out- b/c you can't focus on anything. Simple tasks- looking at a friend to answer a question. If the friend is on the right- all good- but if one is on the left- I have to turn my whole head around like a goof ball to look at them with- "my good eye". Also- with these pain meds- driving is out of the question- therefore- everything is magnified when you are in the passenger seat.
3. My new glasses are not coming in until today- so therefore, I have perfect vision in my right eye- and nothing- I mean nothing in my left. For those of you who don't know- my vision without corrective lenses is .....20/800- yeah pretty bad. So again- driving very hard task to undertake- but without meds- can be done.

I guess all that to say- my eye is bloodshot and yellow- but I have confidence in the surgery- b/c the eye does not drift- so no more lazy eye jokes- :)

So much news....

2006-08-16T09:55:00.000-04:00

After the last post- I decided to update this with exciting things which have been happening with my life. So much to tell- and so little time to tell it in.

First off- many of you have seen my lazy eye- it comes out more and more when I am tired- but now more than ever. I went to a specialist - and I am having my surgery to fix the issue on Friday- August 18 at 11 am. I am going to be at the hospital for the day- and then will require no stitches and no patches. The surgery is 85% effective- with high risks of vision loss. So keep me in your thoughts and prayers.

Secondly- I sent out an email about the following- I got a part in the show "The Boys Next Door." I have been cast as the role of Shelia- I am so excited. I am working at a real theatre- with a balcony and everything. I am so excited. It should open lots of doors for me- for the future in this theatre. I will post more on this in the future - like times and dates and such. So you - who are able- can come and see-

Lastly- The Young Family, who recently lost their daughter- have been going through quite an ordeal. Cherish was found to have bacterial menegititis- and highly contagious infection. One of the boys, unsure which one as that was not relayed- also contracted the infection. Because he was older and stronger- he was able to fight it off, and the entire family has been vaccinated. Keep them in your prayers as they continue to live life to the fullest.

So that's it for me- hope to hear from you all soon.

Cherish Faith

2006-08-09T12:05:00.000-04:00

Cherish Faith Young

Septmeber 30, 2003 - August 6, 2006

Little Cherish Faith Young died at the hospital last night (Sunday) here in Cape Town, South Africa. She started vomiting Saturday night, we took her to the doctor Sunday, then after several hours he sent her to the hospital where she died as we entered.

They don't know why she died so suddenly.

We all are so shocked and miss her so much!

The Lord gave, the Lord has taken away. Blessed be the name of the Lord.

Please pray for these friends of mine- The Young Family-

Vicki, her husband Paul and their three remaining chidlren-

Evangel, Joshua and Timothy

busy week

2006-08-08T11:37:00.000-04:00

Here begins the saga of my two weeks....

After all the excitment of the weekend had passed, I was able to relax and catch up on some much needed rest. So I did. While sitting at work, my mom calls to tell me Maya, my niece, had broken her wrist while doing a handstand. It had been broken for a week, and went undiagnosed- but was healing correctly- so they put a cast on her left wrist. I can't imagine having a non waterproof cast at age 5 in the middle of the summer. But - she gets it off in 8 days- and she is super excited.

Later that night- while the family was realxing from a very exciting day- for a reason unknown to her parents- Phoebe decided to put a penny in her mouth- and began to choke on it. She ran out to the kitchen, pointing in her mouth and gasping for air. Well- Kenny- brother-in-law, did the Heimlich and was able to dislodge the penny and Phoebe was fine. My sister says "it was the longest minute of her life."

And if that isn't enogh- their is more- of course. Later on in the week- both girls were stung by bees as well as my brother in law. Ok-

That is the end to my exciting week.

The weekend!

2006-07-26T08:16:00.000-04:00

So - they much anticipated weekend- has come and gone, and it was wonderful. It started with the end of VBS- which is a great relief; we had a wonderful week, but I am glad to have it behind me. So we cleaned the church and it was done in no time flat. I went from there to the Manchester Airport to pick up Jeremy. His flight was delayed, so I had some time to get dinner, but the plane came in 11 minutes early- so I was able to buy my dinner, but not eat it. bummer! We had a great drive home- sobriety check and all. Don't freak out- neither of us were drinking- so we passed with flying colors.

We were going down to meet Gaven in Boston for the day- so I was much looking forward to this- b/c it has been a year since I have seen- and what a year it has been. We met up with him and Joe in Quincy Market, and from there we ate at Durgen Park, walked around Harvard and Cambridge. We then had ice cream, a little shopping, and then time for dinner. We ate at a great little place right downtown Harvard Square- The GreenHouse. We then parted ways and rode the subway back to Revere- uneventful ride home.

Sunday was Jeremy's 26th Birthday- and we had a full day ahead of us. First- my kids from VBS were special music for Sunday morning- so the kids were great and really impressed those people who opposed VBS from the beginning. We then left b/c we had to get the house ready for the BBQ. In Maine- we really know how to throw a BBQ. We had five different families from the church- who are also like my own family over for lunch and for a rousing intense game of kickball. Girls vs. Guys- yes it intense- but girls lost- well we were creamed. From there we had dinner, and went down to Wells Beach.

Since Jeremy and I are extremely competive- we decided to challenge each other to a game of putt-putt at Wonder Mountain- yes I lost- by four- I am losing my touch- but the funniest part of the course- was at the 17th hole. It was a giant hill straight down to the bottom- nothing fancy. So we played the hole- and then decided to try to hit it back up to the top- to be funny. We both whacked the balls- and Jeremy's was hit so hard- bounced off the side and into the thick shrub. GONE! It was so thick- we couldn't even find the ground- so we got another ball for the 18th hole.

After the golf game- we drove down the beach- Wells Beach. We parked near the sign- "lot closes- 11pm" One thing you have to understannd is- I rarely go to the Beach during the summer- b/c of all the crazy tourists. I didn't pay any attention to the sign- b/c to me- the lots are always open. Jer and I walked down the beach, sat on the lifeguard chair, and avoided lots of sea weed. Imagine- it is 11:30 pm- pitch black- except for the lights from our cell phones. We arrive at the car to - a closed gate!!! The only way out- blocked by this large pole across the exit. Jeremy and I tried to lift it- just enough to get the car through it- but it would be cutting close- I inch closer to Jeremy holding up the bar- then - THE BAR RAISES!!! - Hooray!- We escaped- good thing- b/c I wasn't ready to spend the night on the beach in a compact car!

We approached our final day- with little energy- we wanted to lay low and relax. We made breakfast- pancakes with Maine Blueberries! We then- drove up and down Route One- "Jeremy - this is Route One!" We went to Colony Hotel- which is the hotel where Stephen King wrote "The Shining." Creepy- but nicer in sunshine. We drove down to Walker's Point- Bush's Summer Home. Down to Wells- to eat at Fogarty's- and then a dramatic re-match of mini golf. I won- only by one- but I won! We drove to Manchester- and he was off- until next time!

It was such a great weekend! I really miss them both- so it was so great to see them even as short as it was- it was wonderful- and to catch up with each of them.

What is it about the Asians- that fascinates Caucasians??

It's Friday!!!!

2006-07-21T08:43:00.000-04:00

It is Friday- the most anticpated day of the week. I dreaded this week of working b/c we are covering for three workers who are one vacation which adds to my case load about 180 cases- making it a grand total for the week- 860 cases. It can leave on drained after a week like that, but I am looking forward to the weekend. Jer flies in at 9:50pm, and we will head down to Boston for Saturday with Gaven. We will be going to Shakespeare in the Common- which is always good. I want to make my way down to Fenway, even though the Sox are in Seattle- it is a nice place to visit. We then will have dinner, and who knows what else- say our goodbyes, b/c Gav is flying to live in London- then we'll drive home. Sunday- We are having a kickball/BBQ for lunch and Chinese for dinner- which is what I always do on Sunday nights. Relaxing on Monday- and then back to the airport for Jer to fly home. I am excited about the great weekend- good friends, food and fellowship- and thank goodness!

2006-07-20T09:34:00.000-04:00

This week has been my third year of directing VBS at my church, and I can say- most likely my last. The prep work started back in November- picking and choosing the materials and staff. The months rolled by as more of the plans fell into place. The set was designed, and the crafts were planned. We had two training sessions, with my church- and nothing without a little drama and roadblocks- but it made it to production week. We have had over 40 kids each night, and we are having a blast. Each night the kids sing, make crafts and play games to their hearts content. The staff I have this year- is so amazing and so supportive of me and all my wacky endeavors. I can tell you - their is nothing as rewarding as succeeding in front of people who think you are destined to fail. But above that- there is nothing more satisfying than having kids smile back at you- and letting you know- just by their eyes and smile- you are doing something worth while.

I am so excited!!!

2006-07-18T12:41:00.000-04:00

Okay- I know what you are thinking- who the heck are these people? Well- they are to symbolize my plans for the weekend. My two bestest guy friends are making their way to new England- well- one is already here, and the other one comes on Friday. Gaven, Jeremy and I are taking Saturday to catch up and visit the great city of Boston. I haven't seen Gav since last July when he came to Maine for 5 days, and I haven't seen Jeremy since Memorial Day weekend. So it will be a great time of rejoicing and fun- and hopefully the heat breaks- so we don't sweat buckets- b/c that would be gross!!!

2006-07-14T08:48:00.000-04:00

Have you ever been so nervous you can't get your mind to focus on even the smallest of tasks? I found myself in that quandry yesterday, and this is why.

In my office, I am the in-house party planner, and have had our share of showers, parties, and bashes in the past few weeks to leave me so exhausted just from the parties alone- not including my work weeks. So - yesterday- was no exception to the rule.

We had a baby shower all day yesterday, and I mean all day. We had breakfast in the office, gitfs at 10am, ordered sandwiches for 11:30am and cake for 2pm. It was like a whirlwind of a day.

Also- I had my interview for Virginia- and it went well. i was asked 8 questions, and 30 minutes later that was it. It was nerve racking- b/c you couldn't see there face or their mannerisms towards the questions you asked. I felt I did well- and I should hear within a coupld of weeks. They are sending me some information to go over and mail back. Also they are in the procees of contacting my references and doing a criminal check- which I will pass with flying colors.

So thank you for your prayers and thoughts- I will keep you all posted.

My dilemma

2006-07-12T16:54:00.000-04:00

Recently- I have encountered so disagreements with my church, and its current leadership. As a child of God, my thought is " God is my God. He is the same regardless of how I change- He remains constant. He means different things to everybody- and that is beauty of who He is. To some He is- ABBA- and to others- He is the ultimate provider. " So in thinking this- they way people worship God is all going to be different. You may choose to praise aloud or remain silent- but who is to dictate the way each other worships- no one. So - why do I feel when I go to my church- do I feel the need to worship like a robot?? Each action I take- is corrected- wither it is right or wrong for me to do- some one always disagrees. I am told to be quiet during worship, and to say certain things and act a certain way. If I were to have kids- they should not speak during the services, and if they do- they should be taken out-

To put it bluntly-no way! Who are you that you think you can dictate my way to worship? And who are you to correct me - when I am in the right? I am not talking about the - offer you opinion about how you feel I can better worship - but constantly nagging, dictate, and ridicule how I live my life. Do you know what it is like to be nervous about going to the place where you used to worship freely? You shouldn't.

SOLUTION: Find a place of worship- where you can be yourself- with all your kinks and quirks. Praise God for diversity in His Children!

2006-07-12T08:38:00.000-04:00

Here are the most recent shots of ths kids! They are the best kids in the world, and they really make me smile- even when I have the exhausted days- they make my day.

Can we say exhausted???

2006-07-12T07:44:00.000-04:00

Yeah- I have vowed to write more on my blog- so bloggers can know what is going on.

Yes- I am exhausted. That's right. Who isn't you say?? Well- for the summer- the two job thing is very taxing on me. Like yesterday- I worked from 7 am to 4 pm - with a 30 minute lunch- got in my car, drove to the hotel, worked from 430- 8:00. Long day at both of the offices. So I get home, around 8:30. Greeted by my bed covered with mail, clothes, and things from the past week- that I have yet to clean. I went and sat on the couch, drink some water, and watch the close of the MLB All Star game. Great Ambitions! I sat on the couch and the next thing I remember is looking at my phone for it was 6:11 am. So quick night. Now I am at work struggling to keep my eyes open. Seriously- I need a different job. My work comes in droves- this week is a no drove- therefore, the days are dreadfully boring and long. I feel as though I have been at work for hours, but it has only been 47 minutes.

This picture is taken of me on a lobster (lobsta) boat up in Friendship, Maine- where we had my grandmother's (yes- the one who makes me talk to my dead granddad on the shelf) 75th birthday party. What a hoot!
Ok- here are some updates. I have my interview tomorrow. 2:45 pm- with the Department of Social Services in Courtland, VA. We are doing it over the phone- that way Id on't have to fly down for a coupled of days. I am so excited- it is the half good and half nervous excited. Please keep me in your prayers.

I know....I know.....

2006-07-05T19:25:00.000-04:00

Yeah- I know what you all are thinking- it is about stinking time she posted something on this blog. I am guilty of being too busy. Working for the State- the work comes in droves- weeks where I am so busy I can barely walk away from my desk, and then those weeks when I am bored stiff. Well- the weeks have been alternating back and forth for the past three months.

WORK------And now that summer is upon us...I am working two jobs, 55 hours a week, directing VBS, traveling, photography is being utilized by people, and am working on the weekends as a live in Nanny for Rae and Grace- which I really love the time I get to spend with the two of them. Each moment/ weekend is filled with precious moments. So - I guess you really can't call it work- it is way two much fun. I have been booked for several people for senior shots and birthday parties- which is good paying work I love- I only hope it is something that could take off- on a more consistent basis. Honestly- where it is now is good, and all I have time for- so we will have to see.

FAMILY---- The kids are great and growing way two fast. Abbott will be 7 and in the 2nd grade in a coupld of months. He is so smart and a great kid. I know I am a little partial- b/c I am the AUNT- but he is really learning to help his sisters and brother, along with mom and dad. Maya- she is going into kindergarden in the fall- and boy, is she ready. She finished her first season of T-ball- and like the rest of the family: she did quite well. Phoebe is expressing her creative juices as a very active 3rd year old. She really keeps herself busy with her "friends" - I am not sure if any of them are real, but she has a good time any way. Silas- he is almost 2 and the fastest growing out of all of them. He is currently wokring on talking, he has some major delays with speech- but is picking up on sign language. which is the cutest thing ever. Erica and Kenny are doing great as well both playing softball and loving that. Mama Cita is doing well as usual.

JOBS----- I have been at my current job for just about three years, and with the work I do- I need a change. So - at the advice of my best friend- he said " Why don't you move and try it someplace else. There are other jobs out there Meegs. Pick a state a day- look into it and apply." That's what I did. First, Maryland- then Virginia - then North Carolina- and lastly South Carolina- and 30 applications later. I felt good. I was making a step in the right direction. And for the next three weeks- i just received a flood of letters - confirming I had applied for the various jobs- and I was opening myself up for further investigation(some jobs requiring and criminal check). Most places stated- I would be referred to the hiring agency- and would be notified for an interview. I was opening my mail one day- came acorss a letter from the Common Wealth of Virgina- scheduling me for an interview - July 13 at 2:45 pm. I called them the next day to see if I could arrange a phone interview. Both of the women I need to speak with are on vacation- one until the 7th- and the other one until the 10th. So - I have emailed them and am awaiting thier response. So- I am very excited. The office would be located in Courtland, VA- 30 minutes inland from Virginia Beach. I would be super excited. Same job as I do right now- but much more pay. So I will let you all know.

So that's me- enough info to keep you until the next post. I miss you all- well- not all- the ones I don't see as often or talk too- be well- and let me know how you life is, and remember to keep dreaming

Easter Greetings

2006-04-19T10:21:00.000-04:00

Easter is always a great holiday to spend with my family. We have a early sunrise, egg hunt, breakfast, church and then dinner. My sister (Betty Crocker) always cooks up an amazing spread- ham, home made garlic potatoes, hand made rolls, and a splendid dessert. The kids were so funny and enjoyed all of the fun things we enjoyed together. I went home to nap and then enjoy more leftovers during the week- yummy.

To the left is my family- Kenny 29, Erica 27, Silas 1 1/2, Maya 4, Abbott 6, and Phoebe 3

2006-03-24T08:15:00.000-05:00

Someone prompted me to post my thoughts- so they can be a part of my daily life- and the choices I make. So here goes.

This past week has been a whirlwind. For those who don't know- I am social worker for the State of Maine and am exposed to the reality of how crappy life can be for some people. Each day - I hear a new story about- tradgey and set back- to lottery winnings to abuse. Each day same settings, but different people. At times throughout the day- I feel the pressure and stress from my job, and I almost let it get to me. I am constantly learning and being taught( not a fan of the way taught) from all of the seasoned workers in my office.

I have been wrestling with choices and descions of my life ahead. I want what is best for my life, but I do not want to degrade the things I have here in the present. I have a goo djob, but I know it is not what I want to do with my life. Don't get me wrong- I love helping people and enjoy some of the folks I work with, but honestly- I would never picture myself here.

This is where God has me. Do I stay in a secure surrounding or do I take a risk?

We Like Spelling!

2006-03-21T09:05:00.000-05:00

The chaotic life
Of a twelve year old
Is too hard
And you never know
what's coming next
But in spelling
Things have logic and line
And in spelling
There's a greater design
Though in school we seem strange -
At the bee we seem better
As we count out each letter in our mind -And we find
We like spelling

People love to hate us -Cause Were too dang smart I
n our hearts we do not believe that well succeed
Were annoying -Cause we think on our feet
Im enjoying -My new need to compete
We love nouns Thats our sport.
We love talcum on our towels
We love consonants and vowels
And we feel -kinda real We like spelling

I like spelling too Its a way to not feel rotten
All the slights are all forgotten And you feel almost normal
We are fearless spellers who love scary words
Were the nerds with the dictionary on our knees
Underrate us -With our chronic congestion
Or debate us -Thats a stupid suggestion

Cause we'll pommel your butt
When we prove who knows what
Though we're frightened by the sound of the bell

We love words We love words We love words
We love words We love words We love words We love spelling

I love spelling too That's befortideoked on tiddah
Losing that word brought so much spit up That I'll never recover
The chaotic life Of a twelve year old Is too hard
And you never know what's coming next
But in spelling -Things have logic and line
And in spelling -There's a greater design

Though in school we seem strange At the bee we seem better
As we count out each letter in our mind
And we find -We love spelling It makes us feel normal

We like spelling

YIPPEE

2006-03-16T14:50:00.000-05:00

Yippee- Grace is home!! After only 6 days in the hospital- is home and doing well. Thanks to all who prayed and sent encourgaing notes. It works.

And nobody in all of Oz...

2006-03-07T07:43:00.000-05:00

As many of you know, I have a great affection for the Wizard of Oz. As little girl growing up, I always looked forward to the one time a year when the Wizard of Oz would come onto television. I would push through stomach pains, tooth-aches, and the chicken pox- in order for me to watch the show. Since then- I have enhanced my collection of memories from pictures to ticket stubs to ornaments and stationery. Courtesy of my family- I was able to see WICKED- the Untold Story of the witches of Oz. It was so amazing- a moment I was waiting for for a long time- a really long time- thanks to the lottery :) So- not only was the show a wonderful memory for me, but for those friends who shared the day with me- via the phone or the letters. Even though I could tell my mom- so many times- how amazing Broadway and Wicked were- I really wanted to show her. So for Mothers Day- we are-
1. Flying to NYC
2. Seeing a matinee performance of WICKED
3. Flying home
My mom has never seen a Broadway show- and to stay it- I am was more excited for her than for myself. It is an amazing feeling when you can take someone to Broadway for the first time (thanks, jer). I am so thrilled- I wanted to tell the whole world.

No Wizard that there is or was-
is ever going to bring me down!!!!!!!

2006-03-03T10:28:00.000-05:00

As many of you know- this family- Rae, Grace and Shawn- hold a very special place in my heart. They have all had their share of issues, as many of you know. But- I am excited to report that Grace is thriving and growing. She is talking, walking, and being a great kid. She has had a few bonks and bruises, but she is such a joy to have in my life. Rae and Shawn are not only great parents, but both of them are dear friends. I spend so much time at their house, and I have been so grateful for the relationship I have with the two of them. Thanks

I love to bike

2006-03-02T13:06:00.000-05:00

Okay- so during vacation- Megs and I decided to bike around and have some fun. We found this cement path through these fabulous Palm trees. We had just biked down to this nature reserve, but didn't see anything. except for these animals we made up. We rode all around New Smynra Beach on these bikes. Mine was yellow and hers was green. Ironically- those are each of our favorite colors. I am trying to use this blog for random thoughts- much like my own journal. So I hope you all enjoy being a part of my life.

damn.

2006-02-27T09:39:00.000-05:00

So I am finally feeling better over the cough and cold thing- then what do you think happens? Yes that's right- the flu bug that is sweeping through this office like the plague. I am exposed to so many people on a daily basis with my job, that staying healthy is inevitable. So- Wednesday- I spent the day feeling nauseated all day long- and had the need to wretch more than anything, but kept working in spite of it all. Traveling home from work is usually an easy task- but when you are sweating and shivering- it makes a 30 minutes drive seem like 37 hours. I made it home and climbed into my bed to try to sleep away my discomfort. For those of you who have had this flu- sleeping in your bed is not the answer- sleeping on the bathroom floor a more realistic option. For the next 8 hours- back and forth- back and forth to the bathroom I traveled. Didn't go to work Thursday. After the puking stopped, I attempted to eat some dry toast- bad move- it turned into an onslaught of more trips to the bathroom. I spent my day off- coming in and out of a slumber, which gave me the rest I truly needed. I went back to work Friday- doing nothing but drinking water and ginger-ale- I left work early- or should I say- I was sent home by my co-workers who all thought- "I looked like @#$%"- I went home and rested. Now Monday is here and I feel good- still weaning back onto solid food, but am staying hydrated. Man-do I hate being sick.

GOOD NEWS

2006-02-22T09:10:00.000-05:00

LES MISERABLES
IS COMING BACK
TO BROADWAY

normal life

2006-02-22T09:00:00.000-05:00

So - I decided to post a boring everyday thought from Mee-
i have been working more hours and getting less sleep, so to put it bluntly- I am a wee but witchy. I haven't been able to get the quality rest my body needs, which makes work harder, people annoying, and me a witch. I have been given some relief by creating a napping spot in my cubicle. I brought in two blankets from home, made a little bed, and each lunch break- I rest for 30 minutes- usually fall asleep for my power nap. It gives me enough energey to make it through the rest of the day. So to give yourselves a hearty laugh- think of me- curled up under my desk- trust me - the co-workers already fell I am crazy.
I am happy to report- Maine has been snowless for a week. We have no snow on the ground-which I am sure is jinxing me, but it is ok for the winter to pass by with no snow. We have the bitter cold temps, but no snow. So I can deal.

2006-02-13T14:10:00.000-05:00

First and Last Night of Vacation at Breakers

2006-02-13T14:03:00.000-05:00

Here is the cozy tavern on Flagler Ave.

NOTICE: The Palm Trees

2006-02-09T12:49:00.000-05:00

So for those of you who don't know- I went to Florida for 8 days with megs, mama, and my aunt donna. We spent most of the time on the beach, driving from place to place, out to eat, or just spending quality time together. It had been almost 2 years since I have seen megs- so it was so wonderful to relax with her and catch each other up on our lives. This picture was taken our first day on the beach. We did a few touristy things, but they were kept to a minimum. We stayed with some friends of mine, about 100 feet from the ocean. I learned how to clean and gut my own fish that I caught. You could hear the ocean each and every night. Megs and I had a blast and can't wait to go back- we are welcome anytime. We ate and drank way to much, met some nice people, and hated to leave. But we will always have next year.

Wowser- No snow- No cold- Warm Temps

2005-12-24T07:14:00.000-05:00

Yesterday, contrary to the past two Fridays, were we had snow- Maine was in the middle of a heat wave. Now don't be shocked by these temps-for Maine- it was warm. For most of the day, we were in the 40's. Some parts of the day got to almost 50 degrees. The snow from the previous two Fridays was melting and it just felt good to have the sunshine. We still have snow for the White Christmas, but nothing that I am not used to. I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas and a great new year to come.

Stinkin'- Snow

2005-12-16T11:22:00.000-05:00

So another Friday-another snow storm- This time the snow is not coming down as fast, but it is mixing with rain and sleet- so you can all imagine the roads are so divine to drive on. Life here in Maine has been hectic-b/c work is busier on the holidays, Mom is still recovering for surgery on her foot, shopping, baby-sitting, and church programs. I am getting more and more excited about the holiday season- with the snow- I mean - I hate it when it falls- but it makes for a White Christmas.

Can we say snow??

2005-12-09T21:29:00.000-05:00

I woke up today to see all the school closings scrolling across the bottom of my tv. Much to my surprise, I look out my window and see the ground with some snow on it- but not enough to close schools. I was then convinced that they were closing, b/c of the pending storm. The trusty weathermen said we were to get 6-10 inches, it would fall fast from 11am until dark. So you can now see my shock from the snow coming at 6:15 am. I drove to work- the trip usually takes 25 minutes, but since this was the first snowfall of the season- the plows were not ready, and neither were the sanders. The majority of the traffic was crawling down the main drag at a fast speed of 25 mph, normally at 60 mph zone. So I drove along with the flow of traffic. I finally got to work 1 hr and 15 minutes later. I knew I wouldn't be busy, b/c my job depends on people coming into the office for help, and few risks there lives for it. The snow began to pick up as I was sitting at my desk- fiddling and filing some much needed work. I could see the weather men were right- a fast moving storm. Around 12:30 pm- I decided to go and do a snow clearing party for the older women with whom I work with. I cleaned of over 6 inches on 7 cars- by the time I went back into the office- I was drenched from melted snow. The hustle and bustle going through the office was "Will the governor shut down all State Offices?" Since I work for the State of Maine- we have to wait for the call from Governer John. He goes by the weather in Augusta, the capital, to decide if we close. The storm was hitting the southern part of the State, more so than the Central. We knew -he wouldn't be calling any time soon. So much to our surprise-His secretary called at 1:30pm. Offices will close effective 2:30pm. I hadn't taken my lunch, so I was going to leave at 2 pm. The drive home was worse than the drive in. Blinding snow- I know I am from Maine- but the roads were very tricky driving. While turning onto the final road by my home, a rather large truck came so close to my car- it pushed me and my car into a enormous snow bank. So picture it- I get out of the car- snow coming down 2 inches per hour, khaki skirt, clogs, and my Saturn in a snow bank up to the windshield. Luckily- I was across the street from a garage- a nice man came and helped me out - and I arrived safely at home. I then tackled the shoveling, snow blowing and car cleaning at home. There was a moment when I stood and looked at all the snow and couldn't even begin to know where to start shoveling.
Well all is said and done- we have a clear night sky- with no snow coming down- our dead grass is covered by a thick blanket of snow-
How thick you say???????? 13 inches thick. 13 inches in 10 hours. What a day!

IV's- Oxygen-Surgery- Oh My!

2005-12-02T16:51:00.000-05:00

So the day before Thanksgiving- I was admitted to Southern Maine Medical Center, the Wise Drs. could take some time and go inside and look around at the organs- and to find the root of my year long struggle- with an increasing pain in my side. I arrived only a little nervous- but after a little while- I didn't have a care in the world, but that was the IV medication talking. I was rolled into the OR, where I was met by Dr O'Hare. She explained I would be drifting off to sleep and not to worry- I would be taken care of. I took a breath of the oxygen, and before I knew it I was waking up.
I awoke in the recovery room, where all they wanted me to do- was breathe.
"Take deep breaths, Meegan."
"Don't forget to breathe, Meegan."
"ok, now we need you to cough."
"Rate your pain, on a scale of 1 to 10."
Questions, Questions, Questions.
I just wanted to know what they did to me, that made me in so much pain. Dr O'Hare peeked around the edge of the bed, smiled, and said-
"Meegan, just wanted to let you know, we removed some scar tissue, and then removed you appendix. Everything else looked good. How are you feeling/"
"What- appendix-excuse me- a few doctors ago- they said the appendix was fine- why did you take it out?- was my thought- but I only muttered out "WHY?"
"It had grown to the size of your middle finger, and was inflamed- it needed to come out. I am 95% sure- that is where all you pain was coming from. Rest Up."
So I rested, eat, drank, and then got to go home. In and out all in the same day.
Once at home, I found all my incisions. Three of them- each of them around two inches in size.
Needless to say- Thanksgiving was very low key, and I was able to take a week off from work, to rest and recover. I am better now, just a very sore belly button, as that is the major spot where the tools and camera were inserted. Thanks for all your prayers and thoughts- i know it helped.

Good News! She's Dead!

2005-11-17T11:05:00.000-05:00

I don't have the time to write all the GOOD NEWS from the day yesterday-but to sum it up---it was all I had been waiting for and more. I was brought to tears at some points in the show- because of sheer excitement and emotion. The affects were outstanding as well as all the actors. I was so impressed with all of them- and partialy jealous- i want to be them. My seats were great- I didn't miss a thing- I was in my glory- I loved it. So amazing- I still can't believe it happened to me. Although I had to rush out of the city-I wouldn't have changed the day for the world.

2005-10-26T10:16:00.000-04:00

3 WEEKS TO GO!!!!!

I am so thrilled I can't even believe it. I have been mapping my plan of attack once I arrive in the city. I should be all set. Pending the planes all work in my favor.

3 WEEKS TO GO!!!!

LETHAL LECTURE

2005-10-26T08:48:00.000-04:00

"Lethal Lecture"
Buffet and Theatrical Performance

"Lethal Lecture" is a tongue in cheek
who-done-it complete with murder,
mystery and audience participation.

Saturday Nov 19th buffet
Dinner at 6:30pm
Show at 8:00pm

Sunday Nov 20th
Buffet at 1:00pm
Show at 2:30pm

I am playing the character Hillary Schecke- I don't know much about her- but it should be a blast. I would love for all of you to come- yeah- who cares about the distance. Should be a great weekend.

waking up to the cold weather

2005-10-22T07:32:00.000-04:00

So- this morning- I had to get up and be off to work for 6:15 am- Yes it was still dark and so cold. I couldn't even believe that I had to face the day this early in the morning. I stepped out to the brisk assualt of the freezing air. I was caught totally off guard. i barely had my eyes open- and needless to say- I was forced to open them- so they were frozen, almost to the point of ice cubes. I then saw my breath, like a puff of smoke, all around me. I walked towards my car, and saw the most annoying thing any driver can encounter-----frost on the windshield. AHH- It is October, and I am forced to get up earlier and scrappe these stinking windows. I was so annoyed. So we have been pushed in the frost season- which in Maine lasts until June :)

Extreme MakeOver Home Edition

2005-10-19T22:07:00.000-04:00

I know- how is this picture connected to my life. Back a few weeks ago- the design team came to Maine, and surprised a family of four- with a new makeover. The created a beautiful new log cabin- which is amazing. The episode is going to be airing on Sunday, November 13 at 8pm. I hope all watch it - guarenteed to show that Maine is more than flannel shirts and moose.

So excited

2005-10-18T16:19:00.000-04:00

i just found out today that I am going to be going to NYC for my birthday and I am going to be seeing WICKED. I was given one ticket to go and see the magnificant show. I am so excited I have been all day. I am thrilled- it is a birthday gift from those who are the closest. Tickets were so cheap for the airfare. Boston to NYC- 25 each way. Amazing.

So on November 16- i will be as close to heaven as I think I can.

2005-10-15T09:45:00.000-04:00

So - I have made this journal to keep up on my writing and so others can know what is going on in the life of me. I talk or write to most of you- but in case you want to see where I am going- you can read from here.

I am in the process of really pursuing my photography. I have been getting hired to do- births and parties. I just completed another set of senior pictures. I would love to do this full -time- so we will have to see where this takes me. I am having business cards printed and will soon be setting up my website. MP Imaging is the name that my friend Lori came up with- pretty cool huh? My next step is getting a display together and traveling to a wedding gala- I am almost to the point to where I can do a complete wedding. I have had lots of experience- thanks to all the friends who have gotten married. So I will keep you all posted on the happenings of that. I am getting more and more excited about it.

As far as health is conerned- I am the tesing subject for a few doctors- they have done a myriad of tests and the news is drawing no immediate conclusions- which can be frustrating -but hopefully they will come to some conclusion soon.

I should be working- so I will go for now- more later.

2005-10-05T14:12:00.000-04:00

most recent shot of me

2005-10-05T14:11:00.000-04:00

Girls from VBS